A special session of The Linguofrancologist Society was convened this week in Lyon, France to address the on-going international misuse of the French language. Their füror was aimed squarely at the United States where, in a joint statement, spokespeople for the Society stated that their language was being mutilated by non-native speakers who “studied French in high school” and were so many years out from academic study that their French had devolved into an abomination of epic proportions. The misuse of terms such as “faux pas, fait accompli and garçon” were particularly galling. “We cannot stand idly by as the French language is reduced to cliché with nose-in-air snobbery,” chimed one attendee swirling Syrah. A contingent of Americans stood in protest outside of the gathering with signs unreadable due to mispellings and grammatical erratum.