A 1957 vintage Martin guitar was seen leaving a building on Manhattan’s Upper West Side early yesterday morning. Agreeing to sit for an interview but preferring to remain anonymous, the guitar recalled being unhappy for some time with his owner of 1.5 guitar years. “Great guy but he can’t play for shit.” He added,”I am a realist and I know I need some work done on my neck but, fuck, if he played the intro to Stairway one more time, I was going to stab him in the neck!” Taking a sip of traditional hot drip coffee, the instrument noted that he just read that coffee is good for you. Getting back on track, he railed,”He couldn’t even keep me in tune despite all the useless guitar shit he owned.” Just as he was about to talk about his monetary value, he left for a Lyft car to take him back to the shop in Brooklyn where he was sure he would be welcomed back.
I'm over here now. 