DSM-6 With New Emoji-Related Anxiety Disorders

DSM-6, the newest version of the manifesto of psychiatric maladies, is to be released in the coming months. Sources say that technology-related anxiety disorders represent a significant increase as compared to the previous DSM-5. Specifically, emojis and their use, are viewed as the causative agents in a series of panic and anxiety afflictions. Many of the sufferers tend to be older in age as complaints range from the small size of the emoji to feelings of inadequacy as their younger compatriots are able to reel off a series of emojis in quick succession as the sufferer tries in desperation to reply with just one semi-adequate one. Adding to the confusion, are the various skin-tone options which then lead to self-identifying as a racist and various other identity issues. With the onslaught of new emojis, this disorder is expected to rise in frequency as baby boomers age.  While few controlled studies have been done to date, there is some hope that the newer synthetic opioids may offer some relief.

Some of the newer emojis – Breastfeeding, Islamophobia and vomiting

Author: plutvak

Finally putting those thoughts down that had people scrunching their faces or quietly sneaking away but nonetheless made me laugh. So scrunch, sneak, laugh, enjoy.

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