“He has cat-like eyes,” said an old girlfriend.
“Wanna come up to my room and listen to music? Cat Stevens, maybe? He’s deep.”
A very popular line on college campuses, circa the 1970’s, secondary only to asking to listen to Bread, the Cat Stevens reference was oft used as hopeful entree to bong hits and coital endeavors. Long before “no fly lists” and fatwas (actually, fatwas are probably ancient but stay with me here), Cat Stevens, aka, Yusuf Islam was a hugely popular British singer/songwriter. One can make the case that “Tea For The Tillerman” is one of those desert island picks. Jumping over the controversies and misquotes, he was inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame in 2014 and he sounded great!
Wouldn’t it be cool to have your own Torah? I thought so.
I spend way too much time on Amazon, either buying things or adding to my ever-expanding wishlist. How cool would it be to have your own Torah? I became mildly obsessed with the notion. Amazon? Yes! I knew it would be a pricey proposition but what struck me was not the $28,000 price tag or the $19.49 shipping (I am barely able to resist from making an anti-semitic comment about negotiating the price and/or why there isn’t free shipping on this item, but I will refrain). What caught my eye was the condition: Used – Like New. I think I would have preferred: New – Like Used. New?
I had the unique opportunity with quill in hand to insert a letter into a newly written Torah. I will be 642 years old when it is complete. I don’t think I should have to wait that long.
Brother, can you spare some ethereum?
Bitcoin or Ethereum? Decisions, decisions. I am somewhat of an early adopter – digital photography and music, pyrex, etc. and now digital currency or cryptocurrency. So I took the proverbial plunge and converted all of my money to Bitcoin. With the Bitcoin ATM’s (see photo above) virtually ubiquitous in upscale bodegum, I knew it was time. After all, Bitcoin has been around since 2008, while Ethereum, though I love the name, is a relative newcomer and just seemed a bit too risky. After all, you have to be able to sleep at night. I do love the lingo of the digital currency world – coinbase, blockchain, tumblers, ransomware, corningware, Satoshi. I chucked my physical wallet and as a side benefit, I’ve noticed that I can sit much more comfortably for even the shortest of intervals. I’ll keep you posted on how it all goes – hey, got any coffee money?
I am not a real hacker, I just play one on the internet.
Bleary-eyed, I walked into the kitchen this morning to the shocking scene of my brand-new salad spinner engaging in sexual intercourse from behind with my Sonos Play:5. Voyeuristically, a small dust broom/pan combo set looks on from the windowsill. This is a classic case of crossing the aisle (electronics and housewares) a seemingly lost art these days. The age difference is notable in that the Sonos is from an earlier generation and the salad spinner is the whirling dervish of kitchen accoutrement. They say that politics makes strange bedfellows but apparently household appliances do as well.
Results of the salad spinner’s intended function
I had every intention of taking a picture of my favorite neighborhood ice cream dish – Rita’s vanilla soft-serve with hot fudge. The details are blurry in hindsight although occasionally hindsight is 20-20 but I don’t want to be a Monday-morning quarterback regarding hindsight. Either way, I ate all the fucking ice cream and took a picture of the empty dish. Who needs another ice cream photo anyway. It was delicious and as I have a yet undiagnosed lactose intolerance condition, I barely made it home. Some may say, “TMI, TMI, TMI!” To you I say, “I’m just glad I didn’t shit my pants.”
I think he shit his toga
I don’t think I have one original tooth left in my skull yet I continue to have my “teeth” and head subject to dental radiation. I love lead drapery and genital protection as much as the next, but when I saw what I looked like this morning (see photo below), I knew that enough was enough. By the way, I start Invisalign next week!
Not exactly breaking news in the adult community, kids around the world (and some adults) celebrated the results of a recent study published in the journal of the American Society for Microbiology. The study claims that ingesting boogers can be good for teeth, as well as overall health as they are packed with a “rich reservoir of good bacteria.”
A rogue group of youngsters began smelling their butts and belly buttons hoping that this too will be borne out to be a healthy habit as well. One can only hope.
Fingerpicking is good for you too!